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| • Funeral
Etiquette • Things You Should Know • Getting More Information • Helpful Links |
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| Notifying Others |  |
| Family members and close friends of the deceased should be notified as soon as possible by telephone. If you are not able to make all the phone calls personally, provide a list of people that should be called to a family member or friend. If the |
| funeral arrangements are known at the time you call, be sure and provide the information to the people you are calling. |
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Should
I Attend The Services?
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| Unless there is a notification in the obituary that "services will be held at the convenience of the family" or "private services", family and friends are welcome to attend the services. In other words, if the location and time of the services are included in the obituary notice, it is considered an invitation to attend. |
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Should I Send Flowers
Or Make A Donation?
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| It is always appropriate to send flowers to the funeral home unless otherwise requested. Flowers may also be sent to the family. Be sure and check the obituary in the newspaper to see if any specific request was made for no flowers. It is not necessary to send the flowers immediately. They can also be sent several days or weeks following. Many times the obituary will list charities that were designated by the deceased or their family. Donations may then be made to the charity in memory of the deceased. |
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What
Should I Wear To The Funeral? |
| It is no longer necessary to wear black to a funeral. However, you should choose dress clothes that are more subdued in color and style. |
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What
Should I Do At The Viewing?
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| The visit to the viewing does not need to last a long time. As soon as you have expressed your sympathy to each member of the family, you may leave. Upon entering, sign your name in the guest book. You should then express your sympathy to the family members. Many times the family will be in a receiving line near the casket. You may also pay your respects to the deceased. If a kneeling bench is placed in front of the casket, you may kneel and say a prayer. If you do not wish to kneel, you may stand in front of the casket for a moment. |
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What Should
I Say To The Family?
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What you say depends entirely on your relationship with the deceased and their family. If the deceased is an acquaintance or casual friend, saying "I'm sorry." or "He was a wonderful person." is appropriate. However, if you are closer to the family you may want to ask if there is anything you can do to help or express your feelings about the deceased. You should not ask for details from the family about the illness or death. |
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What Happens
At The Cemetery?
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The casket is normally placed beside the grave, prior to when all the mourners gather at the gravesite. People then gather around the casket to listen to the rites of burial given by the clergy. Following the clergy's remarks, family members may place a flower on the casket. In many cases the funeral director will provide flowers for each mourner. They should follow the family in placing flowers. |
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